Happiness isn’t Everywhere but In Humans Themselves
“Ultimately, the solution is not digital. It is as analog as the human body. Technology can do many things for us — extend our lives, keep us safe, expand our entertainment options — but it cannot make us happy. The key to well-being is shared humanity, even though we are pushing further and further toward separation.”
…is a quote that caught my eye in the book “Do Nothing” by Celeste Headlee. This has to do with how we usually seek happiness when we have already been overworked — especially as someone who lives in a city full of competition and ambition.
“Essentially, we are working our way out of happiness and well-being. We’ve lost the balance between striving to improve and feeling gratitude for what we have. We’ve lost touch with the things that really enrich our lives and make us feel content. We’ve spent billions of dollars in the past decade or so finding replacements for what we as human beings already do well.
At this point, this toxic trend has gone too far. We are digging deeper and deeper into a hole that will eventually bury us if we don’t stop. The stakes could not possibly be higher. We are talking about the loss of our own humanity.”
Sometimes without us knowing we are working too much in our lives, without us knowing what our goals actually are? We may have driven ourselves for so long that we’ve forgotten when we are going, and have lost our capacity for “light-heartedness and play.” Then we feel stressed and try so hard to look for happiness — even if we have to pay something expensive, we are willing to pay for it. Whereas, to get happiness doesn’t have to be that way.
This reminds me of my trip to Java a few months ago. I went to a small village in Magelang and met some people there, one of them was the village head — we call him Pak Lurah. He even let me go into his office. He served me tea, while chatting with him and some of his staff. Ok let me continue with bahasa because we talked in bahasa.
Saya: “Pak, orang-orang tua di sini hebat ya masih pada sehat, masih pada kuat jalan jauh bawa hasil panen ya…”
Pak Lurah: “Oh iya dong, warga sini mah sampai tua masih sehat-sehat, ya kuncinya bahagia aja.”
Saya: “Hahaha gitu ya Pak? Pantesan saya di kota jarang liat yang kayak gitu. Orang kota pada stress semua kali ya.”
Pak Lurah: “Ya iya, kita kan di sini sederhana, hidupnya tiap hari bangun pagi, berangkat bertani, sore pulang, ketemu teman, ngeteh bareng sambil nonton TV. Makan cuma makan nasi, ikan, tahu/tempe, sama hasil panen sendiri. Gitu aja tiap hari. Gak ada beban.”
Saya: “Wah pantes, enak ya sesimpel itu Pak. Nonton TV bareng aja udah bahagia.”
Pak Lurah: “Iya. Nah nonton TV pun kalau buka Metro TV pada gak ngerti, dollar turun bodo amat, saham turun juga bodo amat, gak ngaruh lah, wong nggak ngerti. Beda sama orang kota kan? Orang kota pasti stress tiap hari liat berita gituan.”
Saya: “YAA AMPUN BENER JUGA PAK!” (di situ saya merasa tertampar karena selama ini nggak sadar, berita seperti inilah yang bisa bikin stress hahahahaaha)
Also what I love when I was there is, the people are very helpful, sincere and honest. Pak Lurah drove me by his motorbike to my destination (a place frequently visited by tourists) even though it was during his office hours. I asked why he was so kind, he answered that it is part of his duty to serve society. Hearing his answer, I wondered why Pak Lurah in a small village is so different with Pak Lurah in the city—I mean; the level of the sincerity, the empathy, and the honesty. He also told me even when some of his villagers were sick and asking for help, he also helped take them to the doctor. He said that helping others is part of his happiness too.
So, can you imagine the difference of the habit between townspeople and villagers — and the relation to happiness?
I saw a quite striking difference between the life of the townspeople and the villagers. Townspeople’s life is filled with all the sophistication of things (such as knowledge and technology), filled with ambitions — which sometimes causes them to think only of themselves without thinking of others — that makes them forget humanity. However, villagers live simply, helping others and staying connected with others is part of their lives, and they’re happy enough.
The conclusion is, could be, back to the last sentence in the first paragraph above;
“Technology can do many things for us — extend our lives, keep us safe, expand our entertainment options — but it cannot make us happy. The key to well-being is shared humanity…”
